I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
