WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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