Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
