did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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