Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
