Betty ford says i'm here all night
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Randomize
