Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
