He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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