I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
