you would pick up someone in the library
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
