Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
