How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
