I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
