my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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