i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
