That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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