You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
barbara walters just said penis...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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