It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i came on her dog
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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