How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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