I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
