it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
