i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Randomize
