I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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