9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
