Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
