it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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