Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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