(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
