Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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