i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize