how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
