Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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