I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
