That's intense
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize