i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize