I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
