Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
