i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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