i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
