i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
