If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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