I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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