just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
