I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
