O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
