..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
it wasn't lemon gatorade
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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