So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
