do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
