i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I love you.
Bad choice
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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