I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
