you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
